Oftentimes, the person who drove the abortion-minded mom to the clinic is the baby’s father. Sometimes it is the baby’s grandparent. Sometimes it is a friend of the mother who is there to support her friend whether or not she agrees with abortion.

These support people have access to the mother’s ears and heart and can be a valuable ally. That is, if you can encourage them to understand how they can be a hero and save the baby’s life.

In the facility where Cities4Life volunteers minister on the sidewalk, the support people often stand on the porch or sit in their cars. They are within earshot of us. We never waste a moment in trying to reach someone who will speak on behalf of the baby.

Useful Things to Say To Support People

What are useful things to say to the support people? That will depend on the relationship of the support person to the mother of the baby. It is useful to discern that relationship as it will affect the direction of our discussion. The easiest way to find out is to ask. I am often surprised at how quickly they will tell us their connection to the mother.

Things to Say to Fathers

If the support person is the father of the baby, we appeal to his God-given role to protect the weak and vulnerable. Below are samples of things we call out to fathers.

“Are you the father of the baby? You understand that child carries your genetic material. The words of the father can make a huge difference. Many women tell us that if the father would step up and offer to love and support the child and the woman, they would not abort. Men are given their strength for a purpose. They are called to protect women and children, not walk them on a path of destruction! You can be the father God called you to be! Come talk with us and let us share our resources with you so you can go in there and let her know there are people who can help and you will be right beside her through it all.”

Things to Say to Grandparents

If the support person is a parent of the abortive mother, always be aware it could be a situation where the mother is being coerced. We have seen that quite often with teen mothers. If we suspect coercion, we let the mother know that no one can be coerced to abort, and all they have to do is yell help and the staff is required to call the police. Coercion is illegal.

We also appeal to the grandparents about the humanity of the baby, their grandchild. It is important to dispel the conscious efforts of the abortion industry to label the child as something other than a child, a baby, a grandchild Do not call the baby “it”. Call the baby “he” or “she” or “your grandbaby.”

We might remind the grandparent that they raised their own child to do the right thing. What message are they giving their adult child if they are encouraging her as the mother to kill her own baby, against God’s clear commands?

We remind them of how precious the grandparent/grandchild bond can be. If the counselor calling out is a grandparent herself, she often talks about the joy and delight in being a grandparent. Casting a positive vision is always a good counseling technique, no matter what the situation.

Things to Say to Friends

Sometimes the support person is a friend. If so we let her/him know that we have many resources that can help her friend. We ask her to go in and try to give her friend our literature. We even ask them to encourage their friend to come out and talk with us.  Also, we share our resources with the friend. That way she has tangible facts regarding available help to try to pull her friend out of the abortion center.

Our sidewalk counselors ask the friend if she understands that God will hold all of us to account for what happens at the abortion center. Did we remain silent while that child was being led away to death? Did we speak on behalf of those who cannot speak? Proverbs 24:11 is an important scripture to quote

“Rescue those being led away to death, Hold back those stumbling to the slaughter.”

We advise the friend to heed God’s command to intervene in life or death situations like this. Another great verse to remind them of their accountability before God is this:

So then each of us will give an account of himself to God.

Romans 14:12

We tell them that God calls us to restore those on a path of sin, and quote verses such as:

Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted. Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. 

Galatians 6:1-3

As with the father or grandparent, we also remind them that they could be a hero, save a life today. We let them know about the terrible aftermath of abortion. A great website to educate yourself about those issues can be found here: https://afterabortion.org/.   We tell them abortion obviously destroys a child, but it causes a host of terrible problems and issues for the woman as well. Is it loving, as a friend, to know these things but not speak the truth and offer help to your friend?

Support People Can Play a Pivotal Role

We have often seen the support people play a pivotal role in saving the baby. Sometimes they just need a little encouragement to be bold standing for the life of the child. Don’t assume the support person is pro-abortion. Many times they are not. Most tell us they don’t like or agree with abortion, but are just there to support their friend. If we can show them that true support of their friend is to dissuade them from this path of destruction, they can oftentimes feel empowered to intervene in an astonishing show of courage and strength.

If there is anything I have learned in my years on the sidewalks of the abortion center, it is this. NEVER give up. Be persistent. Don’t waste any opportunity to speak the truth of God in love. Trust that God is working even when we are not sure we see any visible evidence.

Vicky Kaseorg

Vicky Kaseorg

Vicky Kaseorg is a sidewalk counselor and Volunteer Coordinator with Cities4Life. An author of over 25 books, she is ardently pro-life and deeply desires to share the hope and truth of the Lord Jesus Christ through her work, writing, and life. Read her personal blog at vickykaseorg.blogspot.com.


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